Love is a strange beast.  Feelings of indifference can mutate into full-fledged ardor at a moment’s notice, only to fade in the sterile light of morning.  Desire can become obsession, leaving us feeling insecure and exposed.  And of course, it can simply be frightening as hell.  Though this column thus far might lead you to believe I’ve been kidnapped and replaced by some kind of foodie Carrie Bradshaw, that’s not the case.  It’s simply that I’ve had my world completely turned upside down.  By beets.


Allow me to explain.  Until about two weeks ago, I hadn’t had a beet for probably a dozen years.  The beets I’d been exposed to up until that point had usually come in cans (a tragedy!) and been of the pickled variety.  Then one day, while talking to my dear illustrator Mr. Groenink, I mentioned having a plethora of chickpeas in the fridge, and wanting soup.  He, being Dutch and more inclined to eating root vegetables, suggested some Moroccan-style beet soup.  I dutifully purchased the goods, pureed and seasoned, and ate the hell out of them, peels and all.  The next morning when I went to the bathroom, I experienced that fright I mentioned earlier – beets are full of enzymes that don’t really break down in your digestive tract, which can leave your toilet bowl full of all kinds of funny colors.  Don’t worry, it’s normal, or, as Chuck put it, “the happy little surprise you get after a yummy dinner!”  

Beets are absolutely full of happy little surprises.  Beta vulgaris is one of the best foods we’re not eating nearly enough of, according to the New York Times, which dubs them “red spinach,” because they’re so full of folate and cancer-fighting antioxidants.   Beets are also full of Vitamin C, fiber, and sugar.  In fact, beets are one of the sweetest vegetables, containing 10% sugar content in their roots.  The leaves, which are a somewhat overlooked part of the plant, are full of Vitamin A.  If you want to eat all of your beet (and why shouldn’t you?) simply shred the leaves and add them to a salad.

Eating beets places you in good company.  In fact, there’s even a village in Holland named Beets.  Don’t go there expecting a fabulous vacation, though – the 2001 census showed the village center only had 243 inhabitants, and about 100 residences.    Historically, beets have been dined on by the residents of several continents.  The first beets were probably cultivated in the shade of the Egyptian pyramids at Thebes,  and the earliest written mention of the beet is from 8th century BC Mesopotamia.  During the Napoleonic Wars, beets were cultivated for their sugar content, and apparently the term “nature’s candy,” came into vogue around this time period.  Their popularity in literature continues today – in his novel Jitterbug Perfume, Tom Robbins refers to beets repeatedly.  He also says they are “the most intense of vegetables… Tomatoes are lusty enough, yet there runs through tomatoes an undercurrent of frivolity.  Beets are deadly serious.”  

I’m not sure beets are deadly serious, but I’m completely positive they’re absolutely delicious.  The recipe below is a little creation I dreamed up one night while trying to think of a dish to serve with steak and potatoes.  We were all well pleased, and pleasantly surprised in the bathroom the next morning.

Beet and Feta Salad with Lemon-Basil Vinaigrette

For the salad:
1 head red-leaf lettuce
½ bunch green onions, diced
2 raw beets, peeled and grated
1 tomato, cut into chunks
3 ounces feta cheese
1 carrot, diced

For the dressing:
½ bunch fresh basil
Juice of 1 lemon
1 clove garlic
3 tbsp olive oil
3 tbsp plain yogurt
1 ½ tbsp red wine vinegar
Salt and black pepper to taste

Place salad ingredients in a bowl, toss together.  Pulse dressing ingredients in blender, and toss over salad.  This salad goes well with a slightly tangy Pinot Gris.